Introverts Rule
In the USA, a third to a half of the population are introverts; think about that for a moment. That’s one person in three. In Year 8, that’s at least fifteen people, or one form group. And that’s in one of the most extroverted countries in the world. So how come, I ask, is the Western ideal that of an extrovert, when a large quantity of us aren’t?
For those of you who are unaware of what introverts and extroverts are, the typical – yet somewhat incorrect – definition is that introverts are shy, whereas extroverts are generally more outgoing. I won’t bore you with the scientific answer, but a simple version is that introverts get their energy from being on their own, whereas extroverts get their energy from being with other people.
A while ago, I met a boy who was a strong introvert. As a child, he’d often been described as shy, and struggled to fit in or make friends at school. He was used to being asked to repeat himself because his voice was so quiet, and often he’d overheard concerned people asking his parents if he was ok. He soon started to doubt himself – was something wrong with him? Did he need a doctor to fix him?
Some of you may be surprised to learn that that boy was me.
However, I have since learnt through various books and the Internet that it isn’t me being an introvert that’s the problem; it’s how the world treats introverts.
Earlier on, I mentioned that it was surprising that, although a significant proportion of us are introverts, the Western ideal is to be an extrovert; indeed, if you ask someone to picture a successful businessman or CEO, they’ll most likely describe an extrovert – bossy, loud, and not afraid to speak up for themselves. So, does this mean that extroverts will naturally do better in life? Not necessarily – some introverts, such as Mark Zuckerberg, have risen to the top; while introverts might not make great leaders, they’re often better at tasks such as problem solving or programming, as they can focus better and don’t get frustrated as easily.
What’s interesting, however, is that in countries like India, China, or Japan, the introvert is the ideal personality – Chinese students in the US have said that they prefer “humble”, “honest”, and “hard-working” friends, whereas American students prefer “cheerful”, “enthusiastic” or “sociable” friends. Why? The Western ideal of an extrovert was largely spread with the introduction of Hollywood, and with the American Dream being to be an actor or actress. This shows that the extrovert isn’t the natural human ideal – only in Western countries like the US and UK is this true.
In spite of this, in Western countries, introverts still struggle. Some have been sent to doctors by parents to try and “fix” them, though often it’s the “treatment” that’s really causing issues for the child. Teachers try and get children to speak more, seating them in areas with lots of other people, though often this only makes the child speak less. Extroverts bloom at school, enjoying the social interaction and stimulation; introverts wilt, their energy sapped rather than replenished.
One of the reasons that introverts struggle so much is that they can find it hard to speak up what they want to say – one of the unfortunate truths is that society doesn’t seem to care what you’re saying, but how you say it, which is put well in the quote “Those who know do not speak. Those who speak do not know.”. An extrovert could speak complete nonsense really loudly, and no-one would question it.
I find it absolutely horrifying that so many people like me are being forced to suffer, with society not recognising these key personality types.
We must be kind to and more understanding of introverts.
We must understand introverts’ place in society.
And we must stop discriminating against introverts; nearly half of us are, after all.
